I remember the reality of my pregnancy hitting me at around 10 weeks, I was keeping track via an app on my phone that also showed you a size reference of the baby to a fruit, pastry or even a teeny animal- I was also getting ready for my first scan. This is where being a Nurse (and a Neonatal Nurse at that) did me somewhat no favours! I became anxious and quite honestly a little scared to start to connect with my growing baby. I was worried about genetic defects, miscarriage and all sorts of things because that was my daily reality at work and the older I get it really resonates with me that not everything in this life is promised. I shared my feelings with my husband and he tried to reassure me but deep down I still wasn’t brave enough to really connect.
I was on the phone to my best friend Tan one day, having a chin wag and she asked how I was feeling etc and I opened up to her about how I felt and the fact I was almost deliberately putting a wall up and not connecting due to my fear and she gave me what I needed to hear as per! In a nutshell she reminded me of how much I wanted to be a mummy, and that this experience was meant for me and I need to embrace it and create a bubble of love no matter what happens! That chat really kicked me into gear and I dived into loving my growing baby.
So the day of our first scan came and we were both so excited- I was nervous but ready to see my baby… as soon as I saw this little being actively bobbing around on the screen I;
1. Could not believe that I couldn’t feel any movement!
2. Immediately felt like I needed to protect my baby from this crazy world
3. Felt the reality of my dreams materialising, and I could only fall in love
I loved hearing the heartbeat on the monitor so much that I made a mental note to buy my own fetal doppler that I could use at home so I could listen when I wanted and I thought this would be a great way for my husband to also get a chance to connect with the baby too. Once the sonographers and Doctors told us everything was going well and baby looked healthy, I think the pregnancy journey really started to unfold from there.
It sounds so small but that week I bought baby’s first little Teddy and first onesie and the excitement began to blossom alongside my bump. Coming from a large family we are pretty close knit so they all knew from quite early on that I was pregnant and they were elated to say the least! I then started to tell some of my close friends and I received so much love, happiness and excitement and the ones that were already Mums gave me great sound advice. At this point I remember I started to pray for the baby- I was praying before but it wasn’t anything specific, my friend Koko, who was already a Mum told me to pray for everything, down to the last detail and I did (I haven’t stopped!) she also suggested a book that helps with this too – Prayers and Promises.
I didn’t begin to show until maybe about 6-7 months if that! Before then I just looked like I’d had a good meal! My husband and I always knew that for at least our first pregnancy we would leave the gender to be a surprise, although he occasionally wavered we managed to persevere til the birth!
Being pregnant with King was nothing short of amazing. I had no morning sickness, my skin got clearer, my nails and hair grew at a rapid rate and I was blissfully happy at every move, kick or hiccup I felt. I did however get sciatica at around 8 moths which was annoying but I was referred to physiotherapy via work and that worked immensely, so I couldn’t complain.
I tried to cherish every moment of my pregnancy, taking photos, recording and documenting bits and bobs I still wish I did more! But most of all- I tried my hardest to be positive and happy! I would say that I cut out and avoided stress or ANY BS and I suggest that all pregnant women do the same! I took time for myself emotionally and physically- my husband got onboard too and helped me indulge a little just in time for babies arrival! Even at that budding stage of motherhood I was learning the importance of Me… and looking after myself too.